A Forgotten World: Part 2- The Threshold

Typical Monday Schedule:

1. Woke up at 8:30 to get ready for class. Activities include showering, brushing of teeth, putting in my contact lenses, eating some breakfast (this Monday it was eating a couple bowls of Apple Jacks)

2. 10:30-11:20. History of Costume.

3. 11:30-1:20. Voice III: Dialects

4. 1:30- 2:45.  Playwrighting

5. 3:00- 4:15. The Qur'an

6. Time to create some sort of combination of food that can be called dinner.

7. 6-10 or 11. Rehearsal

8. Drive home from rehearsal. Facebook. eat...Facebook....Homework while I have Facebook...

9. Sleep.

These are my Mondays. Yes there are things I left out such as walking to class or texting or doing other class work but this is the general outline. When I look at it, I don't know how I am going to make it out alive. It sometimes makes me want to vomit... in my mouth. I hate the smell so I will find the urge and hold it in.

Time flies and I never seem to have enough time to finish what I needed to accomplish. And I am sure that my schedule is nothing compared to some of yours. I don't know how you find time to breathe with your schedules. 

Yet... even with all of the busyness... I seem to find times to check my Facebook. I seem to find times to text. I seem to find times to not do homework. I seem to find times to do all of these other things.

and I have to ask why? Why is it that despite the schedule that I have above do I find those moments to do those little things? Simply, it pleases me. I like to do those things. Honestly, there are times when I find Facebook and watching Youtube videos more important than getting my school work done or even sleeping. 

This leads me to look back at my schedule... where did I leave time for someone else? Now I am not talking about hanging out or going for lunch or doing fun things... I would include those as a part of this list because, in the end, I do those things because they are fun to me. I am talking about leaving time in my schedule to do something for someone else, that may not necessarily be all that fun for me? 

Look I am not here to see that I shouldn't take time just to have fun. I think those moments are necessary in order to see the joy and life in the world we live in. However, I think that we are professionals at finding things that give us pleasure. (Movies, music, video games, sports, tv, food, cars, clothes, shopping, dating, camping, reading, naps, sky diving, hiking, bungee jumping, drugs, alcohol, sex, money, jewelry, etc.) I am sure you can add to this list. We know our needs and what it takes to fulfill them (think of what you ask for at Christmas, on birthdays, Valentine's Day, etc.) In, fact I would say we may be some of the most in tune people with ourselves. 

First question: do these things really satisfy? Or are they like a band aid that temporarily cures that hole of meaning in life or boredom? I know for me, when I was a kid, a lot of times I would spend the first few weeks playing with my gifts and then they would end up collecting dust in my closet from lack of use. So I would say, band aid.

Second Question: What happened to figuring out what others NEED? I stress need because there is a difference between a need, a preferred want, and a want. A need is something that a person can't live without. A want is something that someone can live without. A preferred want is something that we won't fight to get but won't reject it if it happen to come along (ie: birthday gift, Christmas gift, random-parents'-being-generous-day). For me, I would say that most of what I get is a want or a preferred want. Rarely a need. And what I give has rarely been a need. So again I am faced with the question I posed. 

I think the underlying issue is, most of us, are Truman Burbanks. 

What is that you may ask? The movie: The Truman Show ring a bell? Jim Carrey? 

Anyways, this is one of my favorite movies. The story basically follows this guy named Truman. He was selected from birth to be on a reality tv show about himself. The catch is that he has no idea that the world that he lives in is all about him, all catered to his needs, all based upon his every movement. In fact, the producers of the show erected a huge dome and built an entire city, lake, sun/moon, weather system, etc. just to make this tv show about Truman. 

This reminds me of myself in many ways. In fact, I have found myself many times looking for hidden cameras because I think that I could be on my own reality tv show. Anyways, I think that is where I am at. The world I live in revolves around me. That everyone caters to meet my needs. Even when I can't even see it or realize that that is what I am thinking. 

Yet...this isn't the truth. In fact, one of my favorite parts of the movie is when Truman discovers for the first time the limits of his "world" when he runs his boat through the outer wall of the dome. He then follows a flight of stairs to a door which leads to the outside world. He opens it. He realizes that there is something beyond his world. 

That moment, the opening of the door, the breaking of the outer wall, happened for us too. It happened a little over 2000 years ago in a manger in Bethlehem. The world we thought we knew was shattered into pieces. There is something beyond what we can see. We saw the outer world as Jesus stepped into ours.

Paul would later describe the our world and the outer world in great detail in a letter to the church of Colosse:

We look at this Son and see the God who cannot be seen. We look at this Son and see God's original purpose in everything created. For everything, absolutely everything, above and below, visible and invisible, rank after rank after rank of angels—everything got started in him and finds its purpose in him. He was there before any of it came into existence and holds it all together right up to this moment. And when it comes to the church, he organizes and holds it together, like a head does a body.

 He was supreme in the beginning and—leading the resurrection parade—he is supreme in the end. From beginning to end he's there, towering far above everything, everyone.

In the ending moments of the movie, Truman, looking at the open door in front of him, is forced to make a decision. To cross the threshold into this outer world, which is the real world, or to reside to the world in which everything is provided for him and is about him. To take truth or forever deceive himself. 

We too are faced with this same image. The gates of heaven were swung open and we saw the person in charge. Some even got to speak with him and see him do many spectacular things in our world. And yet, after he died and rose again, he ascended back into heaven, where he currently is, living and breathing just as much as you or I are. But the invitation is still there. To look beyond this world we have built for ourselves, and to see the Truth. The King. Reality. That the world is not what you have dreamt it to be. 

The threshold waits to be crossed. 

"Since you have been raised to new life with Christ, set your sights on the realities of heaven, where Christ sits in the place of honor at God’s right hand. Think about the things of heaven, not the things of earth. For you died to this life, and your real life is hidden with Christ in God." Colossians 3:1-3 (NLT)

A Forgotten World: Part 1- The Peter Pan Syndrome.

When thinking back on my childhood, there are many things to remember:

1. One of my earliest memories is helping break my brother's arm. I say help because, after all, he was chasing after me and would have not been doing so had I not done something to provoke his pursuit of me. It was just unfortunate that that purse strap had to be hanging out to trip him up.

2. The Arizona desert. For those of you that have never experienced this thing, it can be the most beautiful but also the most terrifying and painful thing ever. For example, try getting stuck with a "jumping cactus" with its inch to two inch needles that will literally jump right off the plant to get you and try not screaming. Or how bout the various snakes and coyote that would roam around my church at night. Or even worse the tarantulas that would crawl just about anywhere and catch me off guard. Then there are the beautiful mountains to wake up to every day. And the amazing sunsets, with its rich purples, oranges, and reds that light up the evening sky. 

3. The Couch Sleeping Scenario. When I was a kid, for whatever reason, I did not like sleeping in my bedroom. Yes, the bed was very comfortable. Yes, it was nicely painted. If there were any scary monsters under my bed, my parents' room was right down the hall. So why would I then choose the "den" couch (my family have what we can a den and a living room. I have never really understood why. We sound like lions.)? It is a good question. My brothers did this as well. Maybe it was fear. Maybe we wanted our sleeping to be a family activity. I cannot honestly tell you. 

4. Last Food. My parents made a rule for us boys that 9 at night was the time for the "last food" of the day. The phrase my parents coined for themselves would be " Tyler, what do you want for last food?" While this seems to be a very general statement implying any type of food that you want, this was not so. The main food on the menu was ice cream. All different kinds. And you better believe that there was Hershey's syrup involved. 

5. Kitchen Basketball. My dad was a stud athlete. He ruled football and basketball in the state of Illinois. It was only natural that he would introduce us to these and many other sports. Countless amounts of times, we would venture to the school to play basketball, kickball, or any other sport that we felt like playing. However, since he wasn't always able to drive us to an actual basketball court all the time, we were forced to create a replacement, which is how the awesomeness of kitchen basketball came about. All you need: a tennis ball and a door frame. The imaginary basketball hoop is placed in the middle of the top rung of the door frame. the tennis ball is the basketball (Self-explanatory). Normal basketball rules applied. My brothers and I would play this for hours. And since we had our imagination juices flowing, we always acted as our own announcers and crowd, as if this was the most important basketball game in history, with millions of viewers at home and the thousands in the imaginary stands. If we scored, the sound of cheers roared from their imaginary mouths of those watching. when imitating the crowd, it was never a loud cheer, but a sort of breathy, whispery "yeeeaaahhhh" or "ayyyyyahhhh".

There are so many memories that I could go on forever, such as the many, many, many words that my younger brother and I have invented and continue to use and talk about to this  day. Or all the impromptu movies and shows my brothers and I would put on for our parents, families and friends. Or the ridiculous games that you create with your brothers and best friends when your parents spend countless hours at the church. Or the somewhat awkwardly cute story of when I first liked a girl. The list goes on and on.

My childhood almost seems like another world that I once inhabited, one I can barely remember. There will be so many times that I will be lying in bed or simply walking to class and suddenly, I will be thinking about where I have come from. I moved to Texas when I was in the sixth grade. A good portion of my life is cemented into my life in Texas. In fact, most of my crucial growing up years happened there in Flower Mound. Fine Arts competitions. Middle School. High School. First girlfriend. First kiss. Playing in basketball in school for the first time. graduation. And on and on I could go. 

Yet there was a whole other world that existed before that. The one back out in the desert. The one where I learned how to ride my bike. The one where I went to my first class in public school ever. The one where I got to know what it feels like to get a scratch on my face, knee and arm. The one where I learned what words not to say so that my mom didn't rub my mouth out with soap. The one where I fell in love with Super Mario Brothers, Sonic the Hedgehog and Mega Man. This world existed. It is still as much a part of me as Texas is/was. It is so easy to forget that. 

One thing that my family did a lot of when we all lived at home was watching tv and movies together. So many  hours were spent laughing, staring, and crying (not for me) in front of the screen. Even if we were busy about homework, cooking, or cleaning, the tv was on. i imagine this is what drew me to the arts in the end : )

I used to watch movies over and over again. I would watch a movie, rewind it, and then watch it again. And then repeat. 

One movie that I did this with: Hook. Classic. Robin Williams was in many childhood movies that I can recall (Aladdin, Mrs. Doubtfire, Jack). This movie, however, stuck with me in a different way, and I have been thinking about it a lot recently. The story is so compelling. Peter Pan leaves Neverland and begins a life in "reality" , taking on the name Peter Banning and forgetting of his adventures or origins with the Lost Boys and Captain Hook. He marries a girl and becomes a lawyer. He becomes content with the "normal life" or "real world". His grandmother-in-law, however, knows the truth about Peter's past, about this other world. She is there to remind him of his past, or the other world that really exists. That flying is real. Captain Hook is a real man. Fairies and mermaids are real. For Peter Banning, though, this world has almost become imaginary. Non-existent. Powerless. A waste of time. 

While I don't think Tinker Bell is about to fly into my room and whisk me away to some far off land, I think we share the same disease as Peter does. 

Recently, my life has been outrageously busy, filled with homework, rehearsals, and Bible study. I have had to fight to find down time in the past two weeks. Even on my days off, like today and tomorrow, I am finding my life so tightly wrapped up and less and less relaxing.

Not only this, but my material desires are like a constant growing list. Whether it is food, music, movies or school supplies, the need is always there. It is easy to get lost in this.

When I do find those moments to just sit back and think, a curious thought enters my mind. Is this all there is to life? This world of always needing or always doing busy work? While i do find this stuff enjoyable and even meaningful, I begin to think that there has to be more to life than this. There has to be something that I am forgetting about. Something that got lost in the hustle and bustle of waking up at 8:30 to get dressed and ready for class at 9:30. Something that got lost between the casual exchange of dollar bills and hamburgers between the clerk and myself at the counter of Wendy's. Something that is hidden behind the seemingly meaningless dialogue between a stranger and myself as we cross paths heading to class. There has to be another world that I am forgetting about.

And the fact is: there is a world that exists beyond my world. In fact: there is someone who lives in that world just like Captain Hook, looking to kill me and who has many companions to try and help accomplish this same task . There are beings like the Lost Boys who are there to fight my battles with me and help me find who I really am. There is a being like Tinker Bell who is there and here to help guide me into it. 

Let me me be clear. I am not talking about fairies and pirates. I am talking about heaven and hell, angels and demons, God and Satan. 

We are just like Peter. We so commonly forget that that is the world in which we came from, not this materialistic world. And when I say came, I don't mean we were transported here. I mean that we came into this world from the creative mind of God. He created us. Our desires cannot be fully satisfied here on this planet. Therefore, we must have been created for another world, as C.S. Lewis would say. 

This other world carries power. This other world carries truth tellers and liars. There are those who are there to point you away from their world so that you would forget about it. There are those that are there to point you back to it so that your soul will be saved eternally. The even scarier part may be that we live in it and yet don't even realize it. Or rather, don't believe that it even exists. Or is a part of who we are. 

Let's take a journey into it. Take a step of faith with me into what we can't see, into a world in which we are the spoils of a war, a spiritual war, into a world that will either kill us or save us.