Questions: Limbs to Lose

April 26, 2003 was just a normal day.

Aron Ralston was just a normal guy.

Escaping from the push and shove of his daily life, Aron took a trip to Blue John Canyon.

He was head-over-heels in love with spectacle of the mountains and cherished the thrill of scaling every nook and cranny he could navigate.

Blue John Canyon was a frequent getaway spot for Aron.

Trying to avoid any distractions from the outside world, Aron told no one where he was headed. With his gear packed and heart pumping with excitement, Aron began his hike into the canyon.

8 miles in from his car.

All was normal. The weather. The view. Everything.

One step changed everything.

While descending into a slot canyon, Aron stepped on a boulder, dislodging it. The boulder came slamming down on Aron, pinning his right arm between the boulder and the canyon wall.

Stuck.

With 350 ml of water left and two burritos in his backpack, Aron assumed his chances were grim.

But he didn’t give up.

Using all of the supplies in his backpack, Aron used any method to try and free his arm in whatever shape it was.

He tried to break the boulder. He created a pulley system to try and lift the boulder. For three days, Aron desperately tried to break out.

No success.

Day four: he knew what he had to do. He had to cut his arm off.

All he had was a cheap pocketknife. Though he made a few initial cuts to his arm, Aron realized the tool would not be strong enough to cut through the bone.

So he stopped.

Day five: Aron ran out of water and started drinking his own urine. He had settled into the reality of his death. He began to film his goodbyes to his family on the video camera that he had brought along. He etched his name into the canyon wall, listing his birth date and his predicted death.

He fell asleep, not intending to wake up.

…

Day six: Aron wakes up.

 Aron has an epiphany. He breaks his ulna and radius. With a dull two-inch knife, he performs the amputation, taking almost an hour to do so.

Now, he is free…but stuck in a canyon, 8 miles from his car. And no cell phone

With his one good hand, Aron climbs out of the canyon in which he was stuck in, rappels down a 65-foot sheer wall one handed, and begins to search for help.

Miraculously, a family from the Netherlands is hiking nearby and spots Aron. They provide him with food and water. And then, a helicopter spots Aron and the family from the sky. He is lifted up and taken to a hospital.

I find myself stuck.

Trapped.

Pinned.

I’m fighting desperately to keep my limbs in tact.

“I don’t think that I could live without them,” I tell myself.

But I’m bleeding out.

I’m dehydrated.

What am I to do?

This boulder is in the way. That’s the problem.

I’m not trying hard enough.

Let me do these good deeds, and let me chant a few prayers.

Let me sing a few songs, and let me read from this book.

I don’t want to think about surrendering that which is made me, me.

I don’t want to sacrifice the habit of thinking whatever way I feel like.

I don’t want to sacrifice my freedom to say whatever I am feelin’

I don’t want to sacrifice my lifestyle of comfort and self-pleasure

Give me a new behavior, but not a change of heart

Give me green pastures and the still water, but not the valley of the shadow of death

Give me freedom, but don’t give me Jesus.

…

But as much as I try, this boulder ain’t going nowhere.

I’m stuck.

But don’t get my started about losing these limbs, I would rather die.

…

What are you willing to do in order to survive?

To live?

To find life?

Maybe not it’s a limb to lose, but maybe it’s a habit

Maybe it’s not your physical death but your spiritual death that is looming

…

Are you holding on to things instead of breaking free?